the show

Just some random thoughts: girls always feel insecure at some point in their relationships, even with their lover who loves and adores them so much. Where does all those emotional security come from? Perhaps it is that we never know what will happen in the future. Even with the most sincere promises of love and staying together forever, no one could indeed control what will happen in the future.  If it is not the puppy love period, most promises have been broken. For what reasons could we honestly believe in all those beautiful promise bubbles? Yes, women could be extremely emotional in relationships but we are also clever and calm enough to tell that promises are not for keeping but for breaking. Sad but true. But we still love to hear all kinds of promises, not because we want to believe them but rather that promises are kind of proofs to show love and determination at least in that particular moment.

Do you love me? Will you always love me? I cannot help asking my boyfriend these silly silly questions again and again. When he says he does, I always throw the questions again to test that determination. Then he always second to the positive answer again and I believe him. I believe everything he says and I believe when he promises me something, every time and for everything. I certainly feel afraid that the promises will be broken and the beautiful love story just has to end some day, but I still choose to believe in everything he says and promises. I couldn't comment this as being naive or something. It is just that this kind of belief also gives me the determination to love him back with all my heart and soul. When in love, I dare everything I have to love him and I trust him entirely. Even when some love bubbles are sadly broken, I will still choose to believe and trust in the future, not in the particular man but in love. Love is like a faith. If you sincerely believe in it, it would bring miracle and give people power and strength.

No matter what, I love with my heart and soul. Hurt or not, I believe in love completely. When will I change my mind and doubt love? I don't know. I feel tired sometime, especially when my boyfriend lies to me. I feel sad sometime too. But life goes on no matter what. So I guess I will just choose to be happy audience, dressed up beautifully and just enjoy the show...


Love,
Anna